Getting in fisticuffs relatively easy to do

It’s easy to get in a fistfight.

Go to a meeting of the Young Democrats and loudly defend George W. Bush.

Attend a meeting of any-age GOPers and call Monica Lewinsky a skanky slut-puppy.

Go to Auntie Skinner’s in Jefferson, grab the karaoke mike and, to the strains of “Proud Mary,” start reading from the Book of Revelations.

You can go to a bonfire meeting of the KKK and hand out NAACP or ACLU tracts.

While sipping a libation at a bar, try to change the channel from ANY sporting event except soccer, men’s volleyball or a cover-from-start-to-finish marathon.

Be introduced to a redneck named Bubba Gene and tell him you noticed right off his tooth was real shiny.

Some subjects are guaranteed to get you in trouble with someone at some gathering; capital punishment, abortion and religion are three touchy subjects that come to mind.

That said, put up your dukes.

I’m not a Catholic but I have some staunch Catholican (Catholite? Catholicker?) friend who would follow the Pope anywhere but a community that was wet and too far away to drive to buy alcohol. See, that’s a joke, but some folks don’t take kindly to jokes about religion.

It’s okay to say the Branch Davidians were a cult because David Koresh was a certified whack job. It’s not okay to even be perceived to attack the Catholic Church, or any other formalized religion, for that matter.

The problem is never with the religion – except in the case of voodoo and those crazees that think that blowing up folks for no reason except they can will get them into heaven with a Buick-load of virgins as a reward for seeking martyrdom.

(For the record, in those cases, martyrdom should be “martydumb.”)

But for all intents and purposes the current edition of the Roman Catholic Church and its leader Pope Benedict are handling the latest church crisis as if they were guilty of something.

Pope Benedict, accused by victims' lawyers of being ultimately responsible for an alleged cover-up of sexual abuse of children by priests, is under attack. His reputation is being questioned because, according to the Vatican, he has not fully explained his role in the alleged cover-up and cannot be called to testify at any trial because he has immunity as a head of state.

Just like Jim and Tammy Faye Bakker and Jimmy Swaggart and others didn’t get it, methinks the Catholic Church has missed the point. The point is not whether or not the pope should testify but whether or not the church committed an egregious sin in not reporting the abuse of more than 200 boys in the U.S. in the ‘50s, ‘60s and ‘70s, and countless other boys in European countries.

The point is: The Catholic Church – nor any church or religion -- should not put itself in a position of placing the welfare of the Head Pulpit Thumper above the integrity of the church.

That’s what the Catholic Church appears to be doing.

It’s a busted-nose strategy and you can bet one thin wafer at communion against a steak dinner that parishioners who are tired of being lied to, and the media, which is tired of being blamed for the foibles and lies of others, will come out swinging.

The Catholic Church already has a black eye for past scandals. What are they shooting for now? A sound beating?